Wednesday, 8 April 2009

Green Eyed Monster

As emotions go I've always felt jealousy was the biggest waste of time. Writing the newbie, Best Friends, has made me realise it is also a waste of time for creating narrative tension too. Until it manifests itself into an ugly revenge scene jealousy is internal and irrational and rather dull. Which is one of the reasons that my characters are not that jealous of one another. Another reason is that I am rarely jealous of my friends. It's not they too are internal and irrational and rather dull or anything like that, they are splendid, just that I know that I am the choices I make, if I wanted what they have then I would choose to follow. Hence jealousy = waste of time.

However! Two of my online friends are in the first flushes of their publishing deals Lola Jaye and Keris Stainton and their joy and enthusiasm makes me want to tear out my own eyes to see how green they are. I'm not sure if it's because it's been such a long time since I was last published, or because I know I'll never get to experience the magic of the first time again, but having been with them a while on their journeys from hardworking dreamers to bonafide authors it is really quite amazing to remember how it feels. Amazing and, you know, heartbreakingly invidious.

Trying to have a killer April in terms of wordcount and progress (not the same thing in my experience) but keep getting waylaid by the most irresitable diversions. Nothing was supposed to distract me this afternoon but the postman just arrived with MY WEDDING DRESS. Am I really supposed to write about somebody else's wedding rather than try on a frock for my own? No, I don't think so either.

Fifteen minutes later - colour: fabulous, cut: perfect, cloth:hmmmm. I will resist the urge to shop online for possible alternatives and/or shoes. I will. I will.

1 comment:

Keris said...

Oh thank you for that! Thanks for reminding me that I should be enjoying it rather than stressing about it!